Ashleys Healing

Most people who will read this are probably already aware that Ashley VanNorman has an acute case of Armpitaphobia. More specifically a fear of armpit hair. Today begins the healing of this fear. For now I will not reveal my methods of how I cure this unfortunate child, but I am revealing a collage that may shed some light on the issue. I will also note that any unsolicited contact of your armpits to Ashley will do nothing but help the situation. So please have a heart, reach out and make her touch your pit.

p.s. My favourite picture is the girl with pit hair for the fact that when I found it, it was titled "The Secret Garden".

I have made Ashley a collage of diagrams, techniques, and demonstrations of various arm pits for her "healing". Also, the sketch with the arrow says, "armpit hair is sexy."

me love you long time, mr. football

turkish delight?! you vondruke! 

High School Football

I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels, and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true what he was saying. And yet, I thought 'Something is brewing inside the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw talent that he can mold.' But that's when I felt the handcuffs go on.

Turkish Delight

This blog is about turkish delight. If you have ever eaten turkish delight then you already know... it is gross. Think of the board room at the candy makers when the guy said, "WAIT! I've got it! Lets put disgusting purple jelly inside chocolate as to ruin the taste of the chocolate so that noone will enjoy it. They will be intrigued by the name, and then excited when they see the chocolate, and then.... BAM PURPLE JELLY!" Now you'll all go buy turkish delight and they will give me money for my endorsements. (But don't go to TURKISHDELIGHT.COM or you will find pictures of foreign Women.)

This is me and my blog. If you don't like it I will personally smack you in the mouth.